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  • Meet Fatima ‘TNT’ Lister, a former Temple hooper and 15-year Harlem Globetrotter fixture

    Meet Fatima ‘TNT’ Lister, a former Temple hooper and 15-year Harlem Globetrotter fixture

    The Harlem Globetrotters are a can’t-miss attraction whenever they are in town. With their flashy and fun playstyle, along with in-game entertainment, they get fans involved and bring out plenty of laughs.

    The Globetrotters consist of former high school and college players who adjusted their game to benefit the fan experience. The group includes a mix of men and women, but it wasn’t always that way.

    From 1993-2010, the Globetrotters had no women on the court. That changed in 2011, when Fatima “TNT” Lister joined the team. Lister played at Temple from 2005-07 — she played her first two years of college ball at the University of New Mexico. After playing a few years overseas, Lister tried out for the Globetrotters and earned a contract with the world-famous basketball team.

    Lister adopted the nickname “TNT” from her teammates because of her explosive play and flashy dribbling. Fifteen years later, Lister still dons the jersey and has paved the way for other women to play for the Globetrotters.

    “The fact that I get to kind of open that door back up for women to have this experience and I get to be that representation for little girls, you can tell kids things, but seeing is believing for kids,” Lister said. “So, the fact that they can see me out there holding my own and I get a chance to interact with them and things like that. That’s been the highlight for me.”

    This year marks the 100th anniversary of the Globetrotters, and they will make appearances at the Liacouras Center on Feb. 19 and Xfinity Mobile Arena on March 1. While Lister won’t be in Philadelphia as she is with the international squad, the city still holds a special place.

    The streetball and flashy style that embodies the Globetrotters has always been in Lister’s game. Growing up, the Colorado Springs native loved watching AND1 Mixtapes and 76ers legend Allen Iverson’s signature crossover.

    But Lister’s game went beyond flashy dribbling. She played college basketball at New Mexico for two years, before transferring to Temple, where she learned under former head coach Dawn Staley.

    Lister was a stellar three-point shooter while playing at Temple.

    “It was a privilege to be able to pick her brain one-on-one,” Lister said. “Players dream of that, and as a basketball player, she’s done everything that I wanted to do. But I also got to see that she was very much part of the community. She did a really good job of taking care of her family and just juggling all of those things. It kind of inspired me to want to give back myself.”

    It was one of the main reasons Lister signed a contract with the Globetrotters; they are heavily involved in the community, especially with children.

    Lister’s favorite events are when the Globetrotters can bring a smile to a kid’s face who is going through a trying time.

    Fatima “TNT” Lister tried out for the Globetrotters in 2011 and earned a contract with the world-famous basketball team.

    Lister also enjoys bringing families together to make memories by watching her do what she loves — playing basketball. Each time Lister and the Globetrotters bring together thousands of fans it’s special.

    “This has been an opportunity for me to do something that I’ve been in love with doing in terms of community service, but just on a bigger platform,” Lister said. “I’m really thankful to be a part of this and know how much we reach people, not just domestically but globally.”

    While the Globetrotters’ on-court product may look fun and goofy, the group puts in hours of work to provide the best entertainment.

    The Globetrotters are split into three squads, which allows them to play between 250-280 games at multiple venues each year. Practices last two and a half hours, and it’s not just tricks they are working on, the Globetrotters are doing regular basketball drills.

    Fatima Lister played at Temple from 2005-07 before playing a few years overseas.

    Most of the in-game skits or dazzling moves are improv, and they try to cater certain activities or fun moments to the city they are playing in.

    Lister thought she would play just three seasons in the red, white, and blue, but instead has become a 15-year staple on the team. The experience continues to reap rewards, especially since her daughter, Kali, is old enough to watch her mom.

    “She’s 7 now and she knows she doesn’t have the regular mom, and she loves it,” Lister said.”She loves coming to the games. I always bring her to the court. My teammates are like her uncles and they always make sure she has a good time. It’s been cool for her to see that.”

    Lister has been an inspiration for other women to join the Globetrotters. She says her involvement serves “a purpose that’s bigger than me.”

    “We all have our personal goals,” she added. “But the way I’ve been able to touch other people’s lives and use this thing that I have loved since I was 12 years old — I’ve probably performed in front of over 100,000 people. I don’t know everyone that I impacted, but I know the impact is bigger than even my dreams.”

  • The best things we ate this week

    The best things we ate this week

    Bisi Bele Bath at Malgudi Cafe

    I’ve never arrived to Exton’s Malgudi Cafe and not found a line out the door, whether for a late-night dinner or a blizzard-weekend brunch. That initially surprised me considering Malgudi appears at first glance to be an unassuming restaurant in a Chester County strip mall.

    But this cafe is a special place, not only because it’s one of the region’s few Indian restaurants dedicated to vegetarian cooking, but because it may also be the only one focused specifically on the cuisine of the city of Bangalore, in the South Indian state of Karnataka.

    I have loved virtually everything I’ve ordered here, from the crunchy stuffed pani puri puffs with sour-and-spicy green mint water to pour inside, to the lacy-crisp crepe roll of its onion rava dosa. But for a true immersion into the homey essence of Malgudi, which was launched in 2023 by four South Indian families, dive into a tray of bisi bele bath.

    Known by its loyal customers as “Triple B,” this Karnataka comfort classic is a soulful stew of rice and toor dal (split pigeon peas) that are cooked down with seasonal vegetables until they essentially melt together into a soothing porridge. While the word “bisi” means “hot” in Kannada, this one-pot dish is not fiery so much as it is vivid with fragrant spice — tangy with tamarind and tomatoes then flared with the aromatics of Malgudi’s house masala, a punchy blend of dried red chilies, cinnamon, cloves, and coconut ground fresh. Served hot on a stainless-steel thali tray, there are sides of tart raita yogurt and crunchy boondi pastry beads to add more textures and flavors. On the off chance they’re already out of Triple B (as they were on my first visit), go for the khara pongal porridge of yellow moong lentils cooked down with cumin, cashews, chilies, and curry leaves. Malgudi Cafe, 10 W. Lincoln Hwy., Exton; 484-874-2124, malgudicafe.com

    — Craig LaBan

    Crab cakes at the Bomb Bomb, the classic Italian seafood joint revived by chef-owner Joey Baldino in deep South Philly.

    Crab cakes at Bomb Bomb Bar

    There’s a loose guideline followed by many people who dine out a lot: Get the most adventurous things on the menu. They’re often the best reflection of the kitchen’s passions.

    So it was with a little sheepishness that I ordered, among other items, the “classic crab cake” at Bomb Bomb Bar, the deep South Philly institution that Zeppoli and Palizzi Social Club chef-owner Joey Baldino revived last fall. Crab cakes are frequently delicious, but they are also extremely common and seldom edgy, especially next to, say, whole Dungenesse crab and mom’s stuffed calamari.

    But I’ll be forever content with my decision-making, for chef Max Hachey’s crab cakes are maybe the best ones I’ve ever had — a paean to blue crab, simply treated. To make them, Hachey combines crab meat from three different parts of the crab with reduced, onion-infused cream plus Dijon mustard, roasted-garlic aioli, chives, lemon zest, egg, and some crumbled Club Crackers (“just a few to held hold it together,” Hachey says). The mixture is scooped into dumpling-sized parcels, brushed with butter, then broiled. The cakes are plated, two to an order, on top of a swirl of basil vinaigrette, then garnished with confit cherry tomatoes still clinging to their crispy vines.

    The meal at Bomb Bomb was full of hits, from the zippy antipasto salad to the oil-slicked Italian tuna spaghetti and the lobster and shells in a blush sauce, not to mention those torpedoes of sausage-stuffed squid doused in deep-red gravy. We were too full for dessert, but I didn’t feel so bad skipping it, as it was about as approachable as it gets: an ice cream sundae. Bomb Bomb Bar, 1026 Wolf St., bombbombbar.com

    — Jenn Ladd

    Goat in spicy scallop creole at a recent Honeysuckle x Kabawa collaboration dinner in Philadelphia.

    Goat with spicy scallop creole at Honeysuckle x Kabawa popup

    After eating an extremely gamey Kashmiri goat curry in high school, I had given up eating goat. I use the past tense because more than a decade later, I have relented on my goat fast. Last week, North Broad Street’s Honeysuckle restaurant hosted a popup with chef Paul Carmichael, who runs Kabawa in New York City’s East Village and presented some of his signature Caribbean dishes.

    The goat shoulder was a perfect cube of meat, slow-cooked and succulent, bathed in a fiery gravy of habaneros and dried scallop. Glistening like a crown on top of the cube were fried curry leaves. It was absolute perfection, complemented beautifully by the collaborative dessert by Carmichael and Honeysuckle chef-owners Omar Tate and Cybille St.Aude-Tate: a decadent, mousse-y Marquise au Chokola dessert with rum, chocolate, dulce de leche, and djon djon — a rare mushroom from Haiti. Honeysuckle Restaurant, 631 N. Broad St., 215-307-3316, honeysucklephl.com

    — Bedatri D. Choudhury

  • Was it weird to ask a man for ride or was it weird for his wife to treat us like a nuisance?

    Was it weird to ask a man for ride or was it weird for his wife to treat us like a nuisance?

    I invited two Inquirer journalists to discuss the submitted question, which ended with some strong judgments.

    Have a question of your own? Or an opinion? Email me.

    Evan Weiss, Deputy Features Editor

    This week’s question is a question and a story…

    A friend and I were waiting for Regional Rail for Center City when the announcement came that the train was canceled. It being freezing weather, I asked other passengers what their transit apps were saying, and what their plans were. A man said he was planning to drive to Center City, and his car was parked in the lot. Before I could stop myself, I asked for a ride. His wife did not like the idea, giving a wide-eyed look, but the man agreed after hesitating.

    The husband was very nice, as was the car, but the wife was irritated the whole way into the city — she never said hi or introduced herself and when we tried to include her in the conversation, she sat silent.

    Was it weird for me to ask for a ride or was it weird for her to treat us like a nuisance?

    Beatrice Forman, Food and Dining Reporter

    I am having a lot of thoughts and most of them feel unkind so I’m going to let Stephanie take the lead on this one.

    Stephanie Farr, Features Columnist

    I think it’s highly unusual to ask for a ride from a stranger. From a young age we’re told not to get into cars with strangers or, once we get old enough, not to give strangers a ride. That being said, we all take Uber these days so the rules have changed a bit.

    I think asking for a ride may have put the man in an awkward situation where he felt obligated to help you, but I think the bigger issue is you saw he had his wife with him and you did not ask her if it was OK too. You shouldn’t have just assumed the husband speaks for both of them. I would have been a bit offended too if I was her.

    Beatrice Forman

    Oh, you’re so much nicer than me.

    Outside of the absolute stranger danger of it all (whose to say that man and his wife aren’t Bonnie and Clyde 2.0?), I think it’s absolutely bonkers to assume a stranger would give not just you, but a friend — double the imposition — a free ride when, as you pointed out, Ubers exist. The wife was probably stunned into silence by the gall of it all.

    I’m all for the generosity of the human spirit and know that a village requires being a good villager, but a good villager knows when to read the room!

    Stephanie Farr

    Agreed, so our letter writer is the weirdo and the wife was totally in her right to treat them like a nuisance.

    Beatrice Forman

    Weirdo is such a strong word but yeah, total weirdo.

    Stephanie Farr

    They asked if it was weird!

    A weirdo move, let’s say.

    Beatrice Forman

    My 2026 resolution was to be less of a hater and I do fear this question has set me back.

    I do wonder what motivated the husband to say yes in this situation even though his wife seemed uncomfortable. Do either of you have any ideas?

    Stephanie Farr

    Some people have a hard time saying no, especially when they’re put on the spot in a moment of stress and see someone else in need.

    Evan Weiss

    In an ideal world, giving rides to people who need them sounds wonderful. It’s fair to say that safety is likely not something that presses on the husband’s mind as much as the wife’s. He may have just been trying to be kind without being empathetic.

    Beatrice Forman

    That’s fair! He seems like a nice guy and very generous. I guess he deserves, like, 10 “good person” points for the gesture. He does lose two though for not considering his wife in the moment.

    Evan Weiss

    More than 2!

    Beatrice Forman

    How many points are you docking, Evan?

    Evan Weiss

    I honestly can’t imagine not considering how my wife would feel in the moment. Or, worse, knowing how she felt and going through with it anyway (which is how it sounds like it went down). Minus 8?

    It’s a good deed, but you’re not the only person doing it.

    In this scenario, I actually think it’s the husband who’s most at fault.

    Beatrice Forman

    Ooooof you run a tight program, Evan.

    Stephanie Farr

    Nobody thought about the wife in this situation and that may be what ticks me off most of all.

    Everybody is at fault but the wife.

    Beatrice Forman

    Mayhaps this man is the true weirdo, not our question asker.

    I really do feel for the wife, and I don’t like that she comes off as rude and entitled in the scenario when in reality, everyone else was entitled. I also don’t think the couple owed the question asker more than the hospitality of the ride itself, if that makes sense? The wife didn’t say yes to this, so why is she required to make polite chit chat?

    Stephanie Farr

    Agreed — but I don’t think the couple owed the question asker anything, not even the hospitality itself.

    One thing is for sure, this person and their friend better have offered the couple a few bucks at the very least for the ride.

    Evan Weiss

    The core of the question is an interesting one: When, if ever, is it OK to ask for a ride?

    Stephanie Farr

    When you know the person. Dead stop.

    But even then there are rules.

    Beatrice Forman

    Only in an absolute and total emergency situation, like the apocalypse.

    Stephanie Farr

    Or right after an Eagles Super Bowl win in Center City, when if you don’t get out, you’re gonna stay in till the next morning.

    Beatrice Forman

    That constitutes an apocalypse-adjacent situation. We do sometimes light things on fire when we’re happy here.

    Stephanie Farr

    Very true. It’s part of our charm.

    Evan Weiss

    Any last words?

    Beatrice Forman

    Always, always think about your partner.

    Stephanie Farr

    And if someone has a partner, consider them a team when you ask something.

    Also, don’t ask for rides from strangers. In Philly, if someone wants to give you a ride out of the kindness of their heart they’ll ask if you want one with an annoyed sigh.

  • They put $300,000 down to move up in Passyunk Square | How I Bought This House

    They put $300,000 down to move up in Passyunk Square | How I Bought This House

    The buyers: Catherine Wargo Roberts, 45, content designer; Karsten Roberts, 46, respiratory therapist

    The house: A 1,700-square-foot townhouse in Passyunk Square with three bedrooms and two bathrooms built in 1915.

    The price: listed for $725,000; purchased for $725,000.

    The agent: Ashley Miele, Compass

    The living area in the home in South Philadelphia.

    The ask: Catherine Wargo Roberts and her husband, Karsten Roberts, had no desire to leave Passyunk Square. They were already deeply rooted in the neighborhood, with two kids enrolled at the local school and a daily life that revolved around a few familiar streets. But they had grown tired of their mixed commercial and residential block. “We were very happy for new businesses to come into the neighborhood and thrive,” she said. The block had become “just a little bit busier … than we wanted.”

    The search: In fall 2024, the family set off in search of a new house. They wanted more square footage, lots of outdoor space, and an unfinished basement. “Everybody in Philadelphia wants a finished basement, but everybody’s basement floods,” Wargo Roberts said. “I want an unfinished basement so that if it fills with water, I’m not freaking out.” They also needed to stay in their kids’ school catchment.

    The couple only looked at two homes. The second home was listed as a private sale.

    Their list narrowed the search to just two houses. One was north of Washington Avenue, which Wargo Roberts said “felt like a whole different ballgame,” even though it was close to the kids’ school. It also didn’t have any outdoor space.

    The other house they had to wait for. An agent friend had given them a heads-up that it would be on the market in a few months. The couple grabbed the first viewing available on the first day it was open for a private sale.

    The appeal: Inside, Wargo Roberts was immediately drawn to the home’s size and layout. It was 250 square feet larger than their previous home, and most of the extra space was in the first-floor living area, which Wargo Roberts appreciated. “I didn’t care about a big bedroom,” she said. “That’s not something I need.”

    Outside, the house offered outdoor space that felt special: a large backyard, plus a deck that connects to the master suite on the top floor and a second deck above it. “Most people walk in our backyard and are like ‘holy s—,” Wargo Roberts said.

    Wargo Roberts’ favorite thing about their new house? The giant backyard.

    The deal: The house was listed for $725,000. The couple submitted a full-price offer the same day they saw it. It was within their budget, and “the comps supported it,” Wargo Roberts said. The next night, they learned their offer had been accepted.

    The inspection revealed a failing sewer line and a bowing brick facade. The sellers agreed to a $7,000 credit for the sewer repair but declined to cover the estimated $8,000 cost of stabilizing the front wall. “They played hardball,” Wargo Roberts said. “They knew we wanted the house.

    The kitchen in Catherine Wargo Roberts and Karsten Roberts home in South Philadelphia.

    The money: The couple’s path to a $725,000 home began more than a decade ago in San Francisco. In 2012, they bought a condo for $562,000 with help from Wargo Roberts’ parents. “We never would have been able to do that without help,” she said. They sold the condo in 2017 and walked away with $330,000. They used $235,000 for a down payment on their first Philadelphia home, which cost $470,000.

    To purchase their current house, they used an interest-free bridge loan to cover the down payment while they waited for their old house to sell. “It kept me up at night every single night for 30 days,” Wargo Roberts said. “Because if the house you’re selling doesn’t sell in a certain amount of time, the interest ramps up.” Nine days after it went on the market, their house sold for $612,000, netting them $360,000. They put $300,000 toward the down payment on the new house — roughly 41% of the purchase price. Their monthly mortgage payment is $3,600. “That’s only possible because we had a giant down payment,” Wargo Roberts said.

    Marzipan the cat sits in the master bedroom in the home of Catherine Wargo Roberts and Karsten Roberts.

    The move: The family closed on their new house in April, but the sellers continued to live there for free until June, when they moved to Florida. Becoming a landlord for six weeks wasn’t worth the hassle, Wargo Roberts said. The sellers, she added, “got a sweet deal.”

    She did, however, request a security deposit. “What if they decided to chainsaw the fridge in half?” she said, laughing. “You have to protect yourself to some degree.”

    Because of the delayed closing, the family had time to prepare. They put seasonal items, books, and decor into storage to reduce moving costs and packed everything else themselves. The kitchen was the only thing they outsourced. “It’s a huge pain,” Wargo Roberts said.

    A friend with a pickup truck moved the family’s plants over, and Broad Street Movers took care of the boxes and furniture. “It’s always the skinniest dudes that you’re just like, ‘I can’t understand how you walk, much less carry my couch up three floors,’ but they did it,” Wargo Roberts said.

    The couple installed custom built-ins to cover up a neon wall in the master bedroom.

    Any reservations? “We probably overpaid a little bit,” Wargo Roberts said. “I would’ve loved to get it for $700,000 instead of $725,000.” Still, she is happy with the outcome. “We’re in a house that I feel pretty certain we’ll live in until our kids are out of high school,” she said.

    Life after close: Wargo Roberts wasted no time making changes. She painted multiple rooms and tackled one feature she couldn’t live with: a neon-lit wall in the master bedroom. “I called it the portal to another dimension,” she said. “It was so weird.” They used money they had set aside from the sale of their previous home to install custom built-ins on either side of the bed, covering it completely.

    The traditional South Philly vestibule that the couple rebuilt after moving in.

    They also rebuilt a traditional South Philly vestibule in the front of the home. “It was a vanity project for sure,” Wargo Roberts said, “But I just really wanted one.” She doesn’t regret it. “Best money I ever spent.”

    Did you recently buy a home? We want to hear about it. Email acovington@inquirer.com.

  • How to have a Perfect Philly Day, according to Habibi Supper Club’s Miled Finianos

    How to have a Perfect Philly Day, according to Habibi Supper Club’s Miled Finianos

    Miled Finianos grew up between Miami, Fl. and Zgharta, Lebanon, until he moved to South Philly in 2019. The 30-year-old rising chef, who runs Habibi Supper Club and lives in an East Passyunk rowhouse with a lovely modern kitchen, where his recipe ideas come to life.

    Within two years of its launch, Finianos has reimagined what chef-led dinners can look like in Philly with his exciting weekly concept Habibi Supper Club, an underground supper club in Philly serves the “love language for Arabs” with a big Lebanese feast. Loyal diners and first-timers consistently book out his supper club as soon as he drops the reservation link on social media for five to six course menus showcasing the flavors of his roots — think spreads of shish barak, warak enab, and kibbeh.

    “Having left Lebanon 14 years ago, and I would say it’s important to me to preserve the recipes and the experiences that are attached to these dishes because a lot of Levantine culture is passed down by word-of-mouth,” he said. “So when the mouth gets farther away, it becomes hard to preserve the culture. Habibi Supper Club has brought me closer to my culture than ever before — that’s what fuels me to keep going.”

    Here’s how Finianos would spend a perfect day in Philadelphia. “Habibi has no scary Sundays if I follow this exact itinerary,” he added.

    8 a.m.

    I used to wake up earlier when I was still at my corporate job, but now I sleep in a little longer to make up for some of the later hours of my supper clubs and workshops. Now I can sit in bed, check emails, messages, and socials — I’m a notorious quick responder; it kills me to leave things overnight.

    9 a.m.

    I’m out the door, dressed for the weather, and walking up Passyunk Ave to find coffee. We are blessed in South Philly with a plethora of coffee shops, each better than the next. My rotation is usually between Herman’s, Shot Tower, or Rival Bros. Today we’re hitting up Shot Tower for an iced americano — no matter the temperature outside.

    Miled Finianos’ perfect Philly day includes a stop to see friend/chef Kenan Rabah at Majdal Bakery.

    10:30 a.m.

    After sipping on coffee and reading the newspaper at Shot Tower, it’s time for breakfast. The only breakfast spot for me is Majdal Bakery, where my friend [and owner/chef] Kenan [Rabah] is slinging the flavors I grew up with. (This is a public plea for him to bring back the za’atar manouche with makdous.) With Fairouz playing, I feel like I’m back home [in Ehden, Lebanon] for a bit. He won’t let me leave without trying something one of his new pastry inventions and I will always happily say yes.

    11:30 a.m.

    Sundays in Queen Village means the farmer’s market at Headhouse is in full swing. Armed with my tote and a debit card, I’ll peruse the market goodies, often while on FaceTime with my teta (grandmother) or mother. I show them what’s in season — but low-key, I’m farming for ideas of what they would do with what I buy. Then I head home with my goods and plot some personal menu ideas, along with some Habibi [Supper Club] R&D for whatever event is coming up.

    1 p.m.

    Hunger hits again, and lately I have been on a Vietnamese kick. I walk back up to either Pho Ha or Cafe Diem for a dry rice noodle bowl to satisfy that craving. We really are so lucky to have such a diverse authentic food scene in South Philly.

    Miled Finianos visits the Headhouse Square farmers markets.

    2:30 p.m.

    Now, assuming I don’t have prep work to do, I’ll head back down Passyunk Ave, find another coffee, and sit with my laptop. If the weather is nice, I’ll park myself outside and people watch, daydreaming about a car-free Passyunk Square. This is the time I think of menu ideas, work on future events, and just soak in gratitude for being able to do this as a full-time gig.

    View of Center City Philadelphia from the BoK Bar atop the BOK building in South Philadelphia on Thursday, August 5, 2021.

    6 p.m.

    Now, my social itch is itching. If this is a day off, I usually have plans with a friend — or 12. I like to keep it local, so drinks and snacks at Grace & Proper and Royal Tavern. Or if it’s open, Bok Bar, my favorite place in Philadelphia — the view of the city paired with the delicious pop-up of the month just makes my heart full.

    9 p.m.

    One last drink at my fave dive bar, The Jim. I have been ending my nights with a nice shot of Fernet Branca because anything else gives me acid reflux — that’s just too much information to be sharing, but oh well.

    As you can probably tell now, the perfect day for me is devoid of any chores or errands because that’s what Mondays are for.

  • She was raised as a queer kid by nontraditional hippies. Now she just wants ‘a guy who will commit.’

    She was raised as a queer kid by nontraditional hippies. Now she just wants ‘a guy who will commit.’

    Shelley R. grew up as a gender-nonconforming kid, and she loves the queer and trans community she’s built in Philadelphia — where sometimes she can feel like the seventh wheel when it’s dinner time and the entire party leaves to go on a group date together.

    But she’s also ready for something new in romance. Shelley, who The Inquirer is referring to by her first name and last initial because she doesn’t want her experience to reflect on her employer, is a “nontraditional person seeking normal love.”

    A 31-year-old trans woman, she just wants a nice, monogamish boyfriend.

    Raised by hippies in Boston who were devotees of New Age spirituality, Shelley was assigned male at birth, and as a teenager came out as gay.

    “I’ve never had the choice to just be like, ‘This is my boyfriend. He loves me. We live together and we’re hosting a little board game night,’” Shelley R. said.

    As a young adult, she attended Hampshire College, a small, very progressive school in Western Massachusetts, where she started identifying as trans. After graduation, she moved to Philadelphia, where she underwent gender-affirming surgery as part of her transition. She describes herself now as a “post-op” trans woman, and told The Inquirer, “I’ve had all that work done. I am essentially the same as a cisgender woman in most of the ways that count, except for one big one: fertility.”

    She now lives in West Philadelphia and is seeking what she describes as “typical love.”

    “I just want a guy who will commit,” she said.

    The following, as told to Zoe Greenberg in interviews and a letter, has been edited for length and clarity.

    On being a “post-op” trans woman on the dating apps in Philly

    If I don’t mention I’m trans on my profile, then I’ll get a lot of men who will immediately turn me down when they learn I’m trans, either due to prejudice or because they value being able to get their future wife pregnant. The “trans panic” can also be dangerous, if a man feels deceived. People get murdered or assaulted this way.

    If I just mention that I’m trans on my profile, with no medical information, many will make incorrect assumptions about my genitals, which could be a deal-breaker for them one way or the other.

    If I say I’m “post-op trans,” then I’m putting on my dating profile, “BY THE WAY, I HAVE A VAGINA!!!” which makes me come across as very focused on sex. Most men on dating apps already assume that no matter what I say I’m looking for, I’m looking for sex.

    I think I might try putting, “I have a little secret, and I’ll tell you when you get to know me a little more.”

    I’m only half-serious about that.

    On attracting married men and depressed artists

    Married men are strangely drawn to me. I’ve set a rule for myself: no more. They weren’t cheating, it was always an open marriage, and yet they all turned out to be quite close to divorce.

    I attract a lot of depressed artists and activists seeking a manic pixie dream girl to experiment with. Breakup conversations with me often include things like, “I understand myself better now, and subsequently have decided to move to Iceland.”

    Apparently dating me is a therapeutic journey.

    On becoming an accidental role model for her crushes

    I was on a little trip with my friends this weekend, and we met this guy from Central Pa. He was cute and he was nice, and I was flirting with him a little bit. Then we get back to Philly, and I got a text message from him that’s like, “You’re so cool and so amazing and so smart. You helped me realize I want to transition.”

    That’s another common occurrence: people who date me not actually being interested in me as a person, just in getting to know any trans woman, so that they can figure out if they want to transition themselves. Roughly 50% of the men I’ve dated fall into this category.

    On wanting a ‘more typical romance’

    I was raised by hippies, I’ve been trans and gender-nonconforming my whole life. All my friends are queer, poly, trans, pansexual.

    I’ve never had the choice to be in a monogamous, traditional relationship with a man. I’ve never had the choice to just be like, “This is my boyfriend. He loves me. We live together and we’re hosting a little board game night.”

    I just want a romantic relationship, like what people have. I mean, a liberal-blue-state-normal relationship. If he was having a busy workday, I’d cook him a meal. Give him a little massage.

    I’m a nontraditional person seeking normal love, and not a polycule. Because I’ve already done the polycule, and my polycule was a disaster.

    This story is part of a new series about life partners across the Philadelphia area. See other stories in the series here and here.

    If you want to share your story about who you’re navigating life with romantically or otherwise, write to lifepartners@inquirer.com. We won’t publish anything without speaking to you first.

  • Sixers rookie VJ Edgecombe wins Rising Stars MVP, adding another accomplishment in his terrific season

    Sixers rookie VJ Edgecombe wins Rising Stars MVP, adding another accomplishment in his terrific season

    LOS ANGELES — As VJ Edgecombe stepped to the free-throw line with the opportunity to win the Rising Stars championship at All-Star Weekend, he felt “no pressure.”

    The stakes, to be fair, were far lower than any NBA game Edgecombe has played in so far. Yet even in the ultimately meaningless environment, the 76ers rookie guard reiterated he “really hates losing.” So Edgecombe focused and sank both foul shots, then opened his arms wide to greet beaming Sixers teammate Tyrese Maxey sitting courtside.

    Edgecombe’s game-winning free throws lifted his Team Vince to a 25-24 victory over Team Melo in the mini tournament final Friday night at Intuit Dome. That came on the heels of Edgecombe’s 17-point effort against Team T-Mac in the semis, including 10 in a row and the clinching step-back jumper to seal that win.

    ‘It was all God’s plan’: Tyrese Maxey fell to the Sixers with the 21st pick in the 2020 draft, thanks to an unlikely path

    The two-game performance made Edgecombe a unanimous choice for the event’s MVP award, and spearheaded a group of youngsters who may have injected some competitiveness back into the recently maligned All-Star festivities.

    Consider it the latest accomplishment in a terrific rookie season for Edgecombe, who has become an immediate starter and impact player on both ends of the floor for a Sixers team in the thick of the Eastern Conference playoff race.

    “I just wanted to go out there and show everyone that I can hoop — regardless of stage,” Edgecombe said. “I just want to go out there and play basketball. I enjoy it. I enjoy playing basketball. I hope I showcased that tonight.”

    Edgecombe foreshadowed his intentions earlier Friday. When asked at his media session if he would take a “laid-back” approach to the night’s tournament or as if he had “something to prove,” Edgecombe grinned and responded with, “still compete, so we’ll see how that goes.”

    And how Friday night unfolded for Edgecombe, the former third overall draft pick, mirrored several of his games so far with the Sixers: He caught fire down the stretch.

    Sixers guard VJ Edgecombe brought the same competitive spirit to Team Vince that he does for the regular season.

    A corner three-pointer got Edgecombe going in the semifinal matchup against Team T-Mac. He buried two more deep shots to put Team Vince up, 37-29, then converted a crafty finish and celebrated with his teammates on the bench. When he dribbled to his right and elevated for the mid-range shot to secure the 41-36 win — the first team to hit 40 points in each semifinal moved on — Edgecombe pointed at Maxey and then emphatically nodded at the camera while strutting down the court. He added five rebounds to the 6-for-8 shooting.

    “My teammates were swinging the rock,” Edgecombe said. “My teammates were passing the ball, and I was open. … Then I was coming off the pick-and-roll, whatever it is, 1-on-1. Just go up there and try to get a bucket.”

    In the abbreviated final against Team Melo — when 25 points was the “target score” — Edgecombe initially got free behind the defense for a transition dunk. Then he finished a putback that put his team up, 23-22, before drawing a foul on a drive to the basket to set up his championship-sealing free throws.

    In between those buckets, Edgecombe also flashed his knack for smart basketball plays to complement his high-flying athleticism, while averaging 14.9 points, 5.4 rebounds, 4.1 assists, and 1.5 steals with the Sixers entering the All-Star break.

    The Sixers’ best players should benefit from the NBA All-Star break — but not everyone will be off

    He corralled a one-handed rebound, and pushed the pace with his own speed and kick-ahead passes. He opened the semifinal game guarding the sharpshooting Kon Knueppel, another standout rookie.

    Perhaps most fitting for the player who entered the break ranked 10th in the NBA in minutes (35.4 per game): When Edgecombe thought he was coming out of the final when coach Vince Carter made a couple substitutions, Carter playfully pushed Edgecombe back onto the court.

    Edgecombe’s on-court showcase was one highlight of his first All-Star weekend.

    He called getting to sit next to Kareem Abdul-Jabbar “fire,” another indicator of his deep knowledge of the NBA’s history. He chopped it up with Rising Stars coach Carmelo Anthony, father of his former teammate Kiyan Anthony, at the end of Friday morning’s practice. He got sucked into the whirlwind media circuit that ranged from a high-profile NBA TV interview, to an unserious rapid-fire guessing game to match a fellow Rising Star to the appropriate emoji.

    “It’s a lot of attention,” Edgecombe said. “A lot of attention.”

    But Edgecombe felt a responsibility to Carter, who drafted him first for this event and then encouraged their whole team, “Why not just play hard?” instead of floating through the night. Seeing Maxey courtside provided Edgecombe with a final motivational boost.

    “He ain’t coming to watch it if I ain’t going to play hard,” Edgecombe thought to himself. “I didn’t want to waste his time.”

    The full experience inspired Edgecombe to someday stay through the weekend to participate in Sunday’s All-Star game. But after his endless appearances bled into some actual — competitive! — basketball, Edgecombe acknowledged, “I’m tired, and I’m ready to go home now.”

    He will leave Los Angeles with some MVP hardware, providing further evidence of the terrific start to his NBA career.

  • How a Chinese competitor surged past the EV pioneer

    How a Chinese competitor surged past the EV pioneer

    Tesla, the 23-year-old company that brought green cars into the mainstream, has been pushed off its perch as the world’s top electric vehicle seller.

    Chinese EV manufacturer BYD sold hundreds of thousands more cars last year, and it’s not just in China.

    In most of the countries where the Chinese titan went head-to-head with Tesla — including Germany, Mexico, Thailand, and Australia — Tesla lost market share at an unprecedented rate.

    The end of federal support for EVs has bitten into Tesla’s sales in the United States, while backlash against chief executive Elon Musk’s political posturing has damaged his company’s reputation both at home and abroad. Globally, BYD is dominating with newer models, better batteries, and lower sticker prices.

    “Tesla didn’t just lose its sales crown, it squandered its position as a leader,” said Paul Blokland, cofounder of automotive data company Segment Y Automotive Intelligence.

    “As the U.S. industry retreats behind a wall of tariffs and abandoned EV plans, Asia has taken the torch,” Blokland said.

    In one of the most extreme examples of Tesla getting trumped, BYD vehicles swarmed roads in Europe last year. The Chinese company’s sales in the top 10 European markets quadrupled in 2025 compared with the previous year, according to calculations from Segment Y. Tesla sales slumped 30% over the same period.

    As Tesla loses global market share, Musk has been trying to diversify Tesla away from its EV roots and rebrand it as more of an AI, robotics, and robotaxi company.

    On Tesla’s earnings call last month, Musk announced that he would end production of the Model S and Model X and use the factory space to produce Optimus humanoid robots. He said he hopes to produce 1 million robots a year at the production plant in Fremont, Calif.

    “It’s time to basically bring the Model S and X programs to an end with an honorable discharge because we’re really moving into a future that is based on autonomy,” Musk said on the call.

    The BYD Changzhou car carrier is docked at Terminal Zarate in the Buenos Aires province of Argentina, Tuesday, Jan. 20, 2026, where hybrid and electric vehicles shipped from China are parked next to the ship.

    BYD was founded in 1995 in Shenzhen, China, starting out as a maker of low-cost rechargeable batteries for consumer electronics, eventually supplying Motorola, Nokia, and others.

    BYD has now emerged as a global electric-vehicle heavyweight by controlling much of its supply chain and rapidly rolling out new models. An early investment from Berkshire Hathaway helped legitimize the company abroad.

    As BYD expanded sales across China, Europe, and other overseas markets, it has been reshaping competition in the auto industry everywhere it lands.

    Because of steep tariffs and federal restrictions, you can’t buy a BYD passenger vehicle in the U.S. But experts and customers say BYD offers a higher-quality car for a much lower price in other countries. The BYD Dolphin, an all-electric hatchback, starts at less than $14,000 in China.

    More than 75,000 BYDs were sold in Mexico last year, according to Segment Y’s tally. Canada recently reached a trade agreement with China that would allow more Chinese EVs into the country.

    Experts said BYD has several advantages over Tesla, including a more diverse product offering, lower-cost access to rare earth metals used in batteries, and immunity from U.S. safety and labor laws.

    “High-visibility elements of BYD cars seem to be superior to not just Teslas but a lot of the cars that are being produced by non-Chinese companies,” said Karl Brauer, an analyst at iSeeCars.com. “Musk has got to find another concept to build his legacy on.”

    Tesla offers a few main vehicles with some variation, including a compact car, a midsize SUV and the Cybertruck. BYD sells more than eight models that include sedans, several SUVs, minivans, and trucks.

    In countries where there is a choice between Tesla and BYD, customers say BYD cars look better, cost less, and come with more options.

    Amy de Groot, a resident of Melbourne, Australia, bought her BYD Sealion 6 about a year ago for around 55,000 Australian dollars — about $35,000 in U.S. currency. She said BYD vehicles are all over the roads in her community.

    “Everyone that gets into the car is dead shocked at how nice it is,” De Groot said. “It’s a beautiful car to look at and to be inside.”

    When she was shopping for an electric vehicle, De Groot didn’t give much thought to buying a Tesla. That brand peaked in popularity in Australia about five years ago, she estimated, but Musk’s reputation has significantly deteriorated since then, she said.

    “At the time that I was looking, the Tesla stocks bombed really hard, and resale is always top of mind for me,” De Groot said. “It was a real fad to have a Tesla, and I just don’t think that they’re competitive in any way.”

    According to Segment Y Automotive Intelligence, BYD sold more than 52,000 electric vehicles in Australia in 2025, a 156% increase from the year prior. Tesla sales in the country fell 24%.

    Even in California, where electric vehicles are extremely popular and BYD is nowhere to be found, Tesla is losing market share.

    The number of new Teslas registered in California fell more than 11% from 2024 to 2025. Tesla’s market share among EVs in the state fell 5 percentage points over the same period, according to recent data from the California Auto Outlook.

    American automaker Chevrolet and Japanese manufacturer Honda both gained market share at the same time.

    “The scrapping of incentives no doubt impacted Tesla, but at least it does not have to worry about BYD in its own backyard yet,” Blokland said.

    One of BYD’s competitive edges, analysts say, is its batteries. It started as a battery company and has developed batteries that are more affordable and powerful than the competition.

    Another factor is that battery materials are cheaper to source in China, said Brauer of iSeeCars.com.

    “When the most expensive part of an electric car is the battery, and you have a massive advantage on the cost of producing a battery, you have a massive advantage in the EV world,” he said.

    BYD may also be getting some help from government backing as well as lower labor costs, experts say.

    “Our rules and environmental regulations and our laws about how you treat workers are not globally instituted,” said Brian Moody, an automotive expert and analyst. “It seems to give BYD a financial advantage in that they can charge next to nothing for a car that maybe costs more than that to build.”

  • Dear Abby | Friend’s living situation goes from bad to worse

    DEAR ABBY: A good friend of mine, “Louis,” has big problems. He is in his 60s, and although he’s 50% disabled, he can still work custodial jobs. His sister, “Gayle,” who lives 500 miles away, asked him to move in with her and her husband, saying they would help take care of him.

    Louis moved, not realizing his sister was a severe alcoholic. She’d come home from work, have six or eight drinks and become really belligerent with both her husband and Louis. She even gave Louis 30 days to get out of her house. He has nowhere to go because he severed ties with everyone in his prior location.

    I loaned Louis enough money to keep him from starving as he tried to find a means of support. He has applied for several custodial jobs. His brother-in-law is a great person but is not strong enough to do anything. Gayle has hit her husband on several occasions. They are at their wits’ end and need advice. Gayle refuses to seek any kind of help.

    — THERE FOR MY FRIEND IN FLORIDA

    DEAR ‘THERE’: Louis and his brother-in-law might find some support if they start attending Al-Anon or Smart Recovery meetings. Because they are dealing with a raging alcoholic, it may make them feel less isolated.

    As to what you should advise Louis about his living situation: Since he burned his bridges in the town from which he relocated and doesn’t have the funds to move out of his sister’s home, all you can do is continue to listen to him and be as supportive as you can until he finds work. Because Louis is partially disabled, he may qualify for some services and assistance in his new community. Encourage him to look into these potential options further.

    ** ** **

    DEAR ABBY: My sister-in-law and mother-in-law are going to court against each other. My mother-in-law acknowledges that she wasn’t a good mother when her children were younger. My sister-in-law claims her mother was harassing her by dropping off gifts, notes and money on birthdays.

    Unfortunately, my fiancé and I were dragged into the middle of the situation because we were speaking with both of them prior to the court proceeding. Now, they have both cut us off! I’m pretty sure it was because we wouldn’t pick sides, but why should we have to? We love them both.

    My fiancé had a close relationship with his sister and mother. I know this is hurting him. How can I help bring their relationships back together? My sister-in-law has blocked me from all of her accounts, and if I mail a letter, I’m afraid she will accuse me of harassing her, too.

    — TOUGH POSITION IN PENNSYLVANIA

    DEAR TOUGH POSITION: There is no way you can force a reconciliation between two parties who don’t want to mend fences. You do not know whether your mother-in-law’s motive for dropping off unwanted gifts was to harass her daughter. (It may have been.) My advice is to stay firmly out of the line of fire until after that court case has been resolved.

    ** ** **

    DEAR READERS: On this day that celebrates love, I want you to know how much I value my long relationship with all of you. Wishing you all a Happy Valentine’s Day.

    — WITH LOVE, ABBY

  • Horoscopes: Saturday, Feb. 14, 2026

    ARIES (March 21-April 19). How can you obey your heart’s commands if the noise of your mind makes it impossible to hear? Focusing on your breath pulls attention away from racing thoughts and activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which signals your body to relax.

    TAURUS (April 20-May 20). If you could, you’d say yes to everyone who needs your help or wants your company. But since you can’t do it all, you’ll do the next best thing — decline invitations with such grace it warms hearts and keeps bonds intact.

    GEMINI (May 21-June 21). When your aesthetic is reflected in your environment, you feel loved. And this is why you’ll gravitate toward clean, clear, organized, novel and coordinated surroundings. The work you do will move through your hands and settle back into you.

    CANCER (June 22-July 22). You’ll raise your energy by playing to your strengths and avoiding the obvious drains. Conserving and boosting your energy is a form of self-kindness that creates a foundation of comfort and safety you can grow from.

    LEO (July 23-Aug. 22). Good news on the financial front: You’re rich in all the ways that matter and a few bonus ways, too. And since there’s still no reason to buy what you can’t afford to impress those you don’t know, you can save a little, too!

    VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22). When you have fun, others catch on to your joy. So don’t worry about being seen. It’s good for everyone if you are. As one doctor suggested, “Look at me, look at me, look at me now. It is fun to have fun, but you have to know how.” — Dr. Seuss

    LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Most events are a good time to somebody. But if they are not your idea of a good time, there’s no need to attend. Go with what puts a smile on your own face or at least with what doesn’t make you frown.

    SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Today’s plot unfolds to prove once more that compassion is always best. The self-centered behavior of others will make it challenging, so go slow and be patient, and with a little restraint, love wins.

    SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21). Too much analysis breeds paralysis; action is the way. The movement itself is what will make sense of things. The movement itself is what will change the odds, validate the mission and prove the purpose worthy.

    CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19). Compassion pulls you toward people and you begin to care about their reality, their struggles and their hopes. Before you know it, concern turns into commitment. Compassion ignites passion.

    AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You’ll get attention, though you may be too busy to notice. It’s OK because you don’t feed on external validation. You’re full already. You come to the party of life, after having already eaten at home.

    PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20). Before you buy, ask yourself questions like “really?” and “why?” Confront deeper motivations and life gets less expensive. You’ll serve your actual need instead of getting the quick, cheap, shiny Band-Aid. Honest reflection leads to pure fulfillment.

    TODAY’S BIRTHDAY (Feb. 14). Welcome to your Year of the Wild Horses, when you’ll have the unbridled power, untamed heart and exuberant kinship to roam with fellow feral spirits. More highlights: Fun, infatuation, thrills, illusion and the more substantial fortifications of sincere and devoted love. You’ll delight in the company of those whose style and processes are a mystery to you including animals who teach you about being human. Scorpio and Taurus adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 1, 50, 33, 13 and 6.